I created Authentic Relationships [2023] because I wanted to build a space where we could practice tools and techniques that would cultivate authentic and fulfilling relationships, including the relationship we have with ourself, others, and life itself. When we develop the skills needed to express ourselves safely and authentically, we create a level of intimacy, freedom, and compassion that is truly life transforming. By developing our capacity to listen to another without feeling that we might lose ourselves in the process, or take what they are saying personally, we create the space for others to see themselves and be authentic with us. Fundamentally we will learn to let go of an approach to life that focuses on fixing relationships and discover how to allow the process of relating to move through us naturally.
I look forward to working with you.
Twice per week you have the opportunity to join Susan live (or follow her instructions later using the video recording) for a practice session. In these sessions you will engage with guided meditations, written exercises as well as paired and small group discussions in order to develop essential skills and capacities necessary to build authentic relationships.
The essential skills of authentic relationship that you will practice in these sessions:
- Somatic Body Meditation: You will learn to bring your senses beneath your skin and enter the fluid system of the connective tissue. You will feel the visceral sensations and also the inner states of being that are always being expressed in our authentic natural gestures.
- Embodied Listening: You will learn to listen with your entire being by bringing every fiber of your soma alive and receptive in the present moment. You will discover how this form of deep listening will dissolve the barriers that impede us from hearing clearly.
- Creating a Culture of Compassion: Through careful observation and an attitude of vulnerability you will discover how to give and express in your communications as well as how to receive and hear. This openness will create the space for engagement without judgment or fear.
- Presencing Practice: This practice emphasizes awareness of your body and includes presencing with yourself, a partner, and into Oneness. Through this work you will learn how to speak authentically and listen deeply by being aware of what your body tells you.
The first and most important aspect of relating is presence. If we are not present to ourselves and to others, we can never authentically relate. Too often we are lost in our feelings and ideas about reality, and our biases, fears and desires distort our perception making authentic relationships impossible.
In this session you will learn how to be present under any circumstances with yourself and others.
Topics include:
- Learning how to relax into your own presence by opening to the somatic experience of your body, the quality of your consciousness, and the circumstances around you.
- Learning how to relax into the presence of another without losing your own sense of self by identifying your habits and impulses toward becoming entangled with the fears and needs of others.
- Learning how to relax into who we are when we are not defending, protecting ourselves, or our opinions, actions, and feelings.
- Learning that the purpose of communication is not about getting our way, changing people, or their behavior: it is to establish relationships based on honesty and empathy.
- Tuesday, September 19th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
- Thursday, September 21st @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
This second session is about developing the level of self-knowledge necessary for effective communication. Often our sincere desire to build authentic relationships is hindered because we don’t know ourselves well enough to understand the deeper, often hidden, motives behind our words and body gestures.
In this session you will learn about yourself and what drives you so that you can be clear in communicating your point of view.
Topics include:
- Learning to listen to our bodies to discover the hidden agendas that are unconsciously active behind our communications.
- Learning to be aware when we are triggered by someone in conversation and how to remain clear and compassionate anyway.
- Learning how to communicate directly free from the biases of judgment or blame.
- Learning how to turn our reactive habits into transformative triggers that change your habitual responses.
- Tuesday, September 26th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
- Thursday, September 28th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
In the third session of the course we begin the crucial work of developing a depth of inner compassion that allows you to express even difficult truths in beneficial ways. We can avoid triggering the insecurities of others even in challenging conversations by utilizing a few powerful tools of communication.
In this session you will begin an exploration of how to communicate compassionately from a place of love and calm.
Topics include:
- Learning to use the powerful technique of First Party Communication to avoid triggering another person’s ego defences.
- Learning to perceive and understand the energetic aspect of the words we use so we can be heard accurately.
- Learning how to know what our own needs are in any situation and expressing them in ways that compel real listening.
- Learning how to ask people to repeat back to you what you said to them to create greater clarity without making them feel offended.
- Tuesday, October 3rd @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
- Thursday, October 5th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
In the fourth session you will deepen into the perspective of inner compassion and expand your capacity to radiate with a natural warmth that inspires others to trust and relax. By leading the way forward and modeling compassionate communication you will invite others to join you in intimate and honest exchanges.
In this session you will continue to explore the art of communicating compassionately and inviting others to do the same.
Topics include:
- Learning how to understand what we really want from an interaction so that we can be specific and clear in asking for it.
- Learning the crucial and surprisingly subtle art of asking for what we want, not what we don’t want.
- Learning to recognize the vague, abstract, and ambiguous phrasing that creates confusion and makes authentic communication impossible.
- Learning to distinguish between demands vs. requests and encourage the language of requests in all interactions.
- Tuesday, October 10th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
- Thursday, October 12th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
In the fifth session you will learn how to listen with your entire self. We are trained to listen with our minds and not with our bodies although our entire body hears and understands communication. By learning how to listen to the somatic experience of your body, you will open to a new universe of receptivity that will dramatically affect the quality of your ability to communicate.
In this session you will learn and practice the art of embodied listening and learn the techniques that make it possible.
Topics include:
- Learning how to recognize and avoid any subtle comparisons that we might be making with others as we communicate.
- Learning to recognize and avoid the subtle ways that we communicate with others in an effort to fix them or solve their problems.
- Learning to recognize the negative energy of self-righteousness and develop the inner freedom necessary to drop our opinions and judgements when necessary.
- Learning how to stand firm in our convictions and avoid the temptation to placate someone or backing down in the face of disagreement.
- Tuesday, October 17th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm (US Eastern Time)
- Thursday, October 19th @ 12:30pm - 1:30pm(US Eastern Time))
In the final session you will explore and develop to authentically shift into another person’s point of view. The ability to let go of our own position so that we can see someone else’s is essential for authentic communication. It is challenging to embrace another’s perspective, but it is a skill that can and needs to be developed.
In this session you will begin an exploration of how to communicate compassionately from a place of love and calm.
Topics include:
- Learning to let go of the inner judgments, biases, and preconceived conclusions that make adopting another vantage point impossible.
- Learning to leave our own point of view by giving up expectations and opening to possibilities beyond what we may have imagined.
- Learning how to rest in another’s point of view and examine our own position from their perspective.
- Learning how to let go of our need to be right and embrace an intention to manifest happiness, honesty and empathy.
- Each workshop is conducted via Zoom Video Conference on Sundays from 12:00 noon to 1:30pm US Eastern Time.
- Each practice session is conducted via Zoom Video Conference on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 12:30pm - 1:30pm US Eastern Time.
- A dedicated online course portal that will house all course materials and is easy to navigate and use.
As with any structured program, it’s inevitable that some of us will need to miss a session from time to time. It’s natural to feel concerned that missing live sessions will detract from your experience of the program.
We want to assure you that you can receive the full benefit of the program even if you need to miss some of the sessions because all of the sessions will be recorded so that you can listen when it is convenient for you.
The practice sessions will also be recorded which will include instructions for how to do the exercises on your own, or with a friend if you can’t attend live.
Of course we encourage you to attend as many of the sessions live as you can. At the same time we firmly believe that this program is structured to be equally impactful if you can’t.
