The Mystery of Grief and Blessing

Poem by Shashu Habtu

By Member of The Mystery School

The Spontaneous Writing Circle is a peer-led group in The Mystery School. In timed sessions, a member will read a poem or excerpt of prose after which the group write what's present to each of them, unedited and uncensored. The intention is to have the words appear while any effort to create them is surrendered. Each person then reads their writing to each other, and no critique is offered. This absence of distinctions and value judgments has created an open and lively space of ease, appreciation and creativity and a constant experience of wonder. This piece was written in one of these circles.

Grief that triggers tears rolling down my face
Grief that stirs up each strand of my body
Grief that makes me yearn for my beloveds to resurrect
As I am gripped by Grief
Each cell in my body cries out
And the accumulation of the feelings
Squeezed out of my body
End up pouring tears
These tears are sometimes frantic
Sometimes smoothly flowing like a water fall
I experience the different facets of Grief
Without hindering its expression
Calm takes over as I surrender to what is
Elevated to a different knowing I find myself Blessing my Grief
It is the very act of letting go
That propels closure to my Grief
I then realize
Grief swept me to Blessings after washing away what blocked me
Grief Expressed by my tears
It has become a Doorway
to understand that I have no control over anything
At the root of Grief is a seed
A seed ready to solidify around itself and be rooted like a tree
It is a seed to the sacred land of knowing who I am

I am not the flesh and blood that is a gateway to tears
I am a sacred force with no location
I use this body to experience my very nature
Only through Polarity of Grief and Blessings
Could I really understand the Impermanence of it all?
Including this Body that Grieves
I honor Grief because it sweeps away that which that stands my way
It alerts me to realize that I have no control
And yet I do have control to be Present
Blessed I am in spite of the hiccups of Grief
I learn the Fluidity of Life
How could I not see it as Blessings?
The loss of a loved one generated Grief only to recognize the Blessings of those that are living
Nothing, nothing, nothing is Permanent
What then am I to expect from this flowing life
The whole seems to hold both Grief & Blessings
My learning then is to respect each season
Stop looking at it as if it is permanent
Release attachment
Respect feelings
Notice feelings that generate emotions are all temporary
Nothing stays the same
And each emotion whether it be Grief or Blessing
It is there to move me to a Higher Plane
A space where I have never been to
My curiosity gets heightened as I ask
What Grief brings to me
What Blessing brings me
Each interchangeably I recognize is a Gift